I used 2 moan 2 God abt my circumstances but now i talk 2 my Father abt how so much bigger He is compared 2 any of my situations! Selah

There are only two things in life that are mandatory.
Birth and Death.
Everything else is optional... agree?

Its so great to b at a party where nobody recognises me!

Ever been on a 'big man ting' then looked around and found urself in the bookie corner?

Just seen a girl at this party... I've dubbed her 'barbie skank' i'll leave it 2 ur imagination...

Wow i already smell puke breath it aint even midnight yet

I'm at a house party and some of the dancing has me wishing i had vid cam eyes, �250 wuda been mine... U been framed ... Lol

I want a girl who isn't so spiritually deep every time she cooks she presents me with burnt offerings...

Top uk actors of the decade @adrianlester @noelclarke @ashleywalters Big!

That Chelsea goalie didnt even bother i think the rest of the team took a leaf out of his book

Here's a dumb joke... What do u call a south american man who's car's been stolen? ... Carlos

I think Chelsea supporters should just got to sleep, it'll save them having a bad nite

'low me, i'm counting the grain on the carpet...

Cant believe i'm being forced a watch brokeback waste-enders, no wonder england's got social issues this is a disfunctional show

Why do the annoying passengers always have to be going to your destination? Even in first class!

Just spent 4 hrs travelling a journey that should have been 2 hrs. I officially hate the idle chit chat people torture me with to hide there fear of silence!